As children in Central Florida and around the world prepare to celebrate
Christmas, Santa and NASA’s Kennedy Space Center (KSC) landing convoy team
are rumored to have conducted secret exercises to address any possible
contingencies that might arise during Santa’s annual space flight.

Continuing a long-standing tradition at KSC, the Shuttle Landing Facility
(SLF), also known this time of the year as the “Sleigh” Landing Facility,
will be available to Santa if an emergency landing is required during his
mission. Built in 1975, the landing strip is 300 feet wide and 15,000 feet
long, with 1,000-foot overruns at each end. It extends from northwest to
southeast and is located about three miles from the 525-foot-tall Vehicle
Assembly Building.

In the event of an emergency landing by the reindeer-propelled sleigh, the
KSC landing convoy team will be available to assist Santa once the sleigh is
safely on the ground.

The KSC landing convoy vehicles will be “on-call” beginning the afternoon of
Dec. 24. The primary functions of the convoy team will be to provide
immediate service to the sleigh after landing, assist in Santa’s egress from
the toy-laden vehicle, and prepare it for towing to the Sleigh Processing
Facility (located adjacent to the Orbiter Processing Facility) for emergency
repairs, if required.

A new state-of-the-art convoy command vehicle, commissioned in June 2002,
will lead the convoy. The new vehicle is equipped to control critical
communications between the Shuttle orbiter, the crew and the Launch Control
Center, to monitor the health of the orbiter systems, and to direct convoy
operations at the SLF.

A recent modification to the new command vehicle also permits specially
trained KSC personnel to privately communicate with Santa via closed loop
state-of-the-art circuits and guide his reindeer to a safe landing if the
sleigh’s navigational systems fail.

Denny Gagen, KSC’s convoy commander reports, “I have no comment on whether
the emergency simulations with Santa did or did not occur, but I can say
with certainty that the Shuttle orbiter is not the only ‘orbiter’ with which
the new convoy command vehicle can communicate.”

According to inside sources, the convoy personnel on call will be prepared
to don SCAPE suits, (Self-Contained Atmospheric Protective Ensemble suits),
for protection from the expected large amounts of ice and snow that
frequently accumulate on high-flying sleighs.

Once Santa’s egress procedures are complete, the Crew Transport Vehicle
(CTV), also used by disembarking Shuttle crews, will be moved into position
on the sleigh’s port side. A KSC physician will be on stand-by to board the
sleigh and conduct a physical examination, if required. (Typically, milk and
cookies are all that is necessary during stops.) The CTV will allow Santa
the privacy to leave his sleigh and change from his red, fur-lined flight
suit into his work clothes. He can then perform any necessary mechanical
repairs before returning to his scheduled deliveries.

In the event the emergency is not mechanical in nature, the SLF Landing Aids
Control Building (LACB) is equipped with telephones, a clean-rag canister,
water faucets and a hose, an eyewash rack, a snack bar, and bathrooms.

When asked to comment on this emergency contingency plan, Santa refused,
citing a heavy workload this time of year. Queries forwarded to his Public
Affairs Office went unanswered.